Some two decades ago, a fellow traveler posed this question to me. “What do you think is the world’s greatest problem?”
In my limited worldview, I replied, “Poverty?”
Thankfully, she didn’t laugh at me. But her answer floored me, “Mental illness.”
She came from a first-world country while I came from a third. She was 20 years older than me. Our perspectives were different. And I could not fathom how mental illness could be the world’s greatest problem.
I later learned she had lost her son in a shooting.
We don’t know what led the Grade 8 shooter at the Ateneo de Zamboanga University Junior High School campus in Zamboanga City to bring two firearms to school that morning and start shooting.
He was an achiever, at the top of his class. But our intelligence quotient has nothing to do with our emotional stability. Sometimes, in fact, it is the highly intelligent who are prone to depression because they think too deeply.
He had friends. He had family. He was loved. This is perception, not necessarily reality. We can be told we are loved yet not feel it—as when a philandering husband keeps telling his wife he loves her deeply.
One can hide great pain with a smile. The highly intelligent are most effective at masking emotional turmoil.
We may never know why the shooter did what he did because he also turned the gun on himself. But his action of livestreaming his activity on a shock/gore site where violent activities are streamed leads me to believe that he had become a victim of Nihilistic Violent Extremism (NVE).
How do we prevent our children from becoming radicalized?
I’m not an expert on the subject but I assume that what protects our children from such dangers (as with grooming or brainwashing) other than digital literacy since this usually occurs in cyberspace would be a strong sense of self and security.
We have to foster critical thinking in our children, encourage them to have a mind of their own and give them the liberty to make their own decisions early. Making small decisions every day builds their confidence and hones their decision-making abilities.
We need to assign our children real responsibilities. Start with chores. This makes them feel needed and valued. And the more tasks they are able to accomplish as they grow up, the more competent they will feel.
We should provide a strong support system. We let them go but we tell them we are here should they need help. Because they will definitely make mistakes but they will learn better from their mistakes than from our TED talks.
It will be very difficult for them to develop a strong sense of self if they feel incompetent and incapable or to develop a deep sense of security if they feel unloved and unsupported.
Home should be a sanctuary not a battleground.
All shooters are unwell. But not all of them are mentally ill.
Some are simply victims of extreme and repeated trauma causing psychotic breaks that cause them to commit acts of violence.
Good people can fall into a bad place. When they kill themselves, it is an act of hopelessness. When they kill others, it is a cry for help, a call to be seen and heard.
Perhaps, when they see the bodies, they will believe me. Feel my pain. Take me seriously. Finally.
When a child is killed, it is a tragedy. But when a child kills, it is a monstrosity. Society must not only shed tears; it must accept accountability.
How many more children need to die for the world to understand that we need to love, learn and listen?
The world’s greatest problem is not “mental illness”; it is indifference.