LIFE often feels like an illusion—we believe we have control over time and the world around us, pushing ourselves to accomplish so much within limited hours. Yet, we sometimes forget that it is only by God's grace that we can face life’s challenges. In our pursuit of productivity, we fail to dedicate quality time to our families, friends, and loved ones. We act as if we are machines, capable of working beyond human limits, until God intervenes to remind us that life is not solely about work.
There comes a time when our bodies demand rest, when exhaustion overtakes us no matter how much we will ourselves to keep going. When even breathing becomes a struggle, our bodies plead for us to slow down. But for those of us who are accustomed to pushing ourselves to the brink, slowing down is not easy. Feeling the air enter our lungs is something we often take for granted, but when life itself hangs in the balance, every breath becomes precious and miraculous.
Over the past two weeks, during my time in the hospital, I experienced these realizations firsthand. As I struggled to breathe, my mind was still preoccupied with my work responsibilities, never considering seeking medical attention. It was only when my colleague, Trisha Bengay, noticed my labored breathing that nursing interventions were provided by my fellow clinical instructors. I am deeply grateful to Cynthia Jane Villanueva, Grace Guitguiten, Bee Lalong-Isip, Gina Dela Cruz, Benzaid Omar, Jeepe Berondo Lagrimosa and many others whose names I may have missed.
The first two days in the hospital were particularly challenging. My family and I faced a crucial decision—whether to undergo a procedure that could save my life but would also bring significant changes. We are immensely thankful to Dr. Joey Villanueva for enlightening us on the benefits of dialysis and to Dr. Placibella Salegon, Dr. Marjorie Guillermo-Pajarito, Dr. Jessie Orcasitas, and Dr. Louie Metran for their exceptional care and medical expertise.
During my initial dialysis sessions, I was naïve and fearful. As my blood pressure dropped to 80/60, I felt as if I were slipping away. But the unwavering presence of my husband, Rey, and my children gave me the strength to fight for my life. My best friends—Rolan Domingo, Grace Dela Vega, Lera Genise, Louiza Denia, Nancy Bargamento, Melba Gabuya, Bang Jadulang, Luz Alilin, Duke Handugan and many more—helped me find light even in my darkest moments.
As I prepared for discharge, another challenge arose—the overwhelming hospital expenses that exceeded my health insurance coverage. In this difficult time, the love and generosity of my AdDU co-clinical instructors, Dr. Liza G. Floresca, Ma’am Hadji Balajadia, Sir Jimmy Delgado, Vange Reyes, Jong Reyataza, Brokenshire Hospital, Dr. Anna Saus,Dinna Bayog and my friends abroad became a source of relief. I am also profoundly grateful to Father Karel S. San Juan, S.J., President of Ateneo de Davao University, for his prayers for my recovery.
Life is indeed unpredictable. Though it comes with its highs and lows, I have realized that life remains beautiful, even amidst pain. Pain has a way of drawing us closer to God, allowing us to surrender our uncertainties to Him. With faith, we can rest without worry and awaken with hope, trusting that in time, our strength will be restored. This time, however, we must honor our bodies, minds, and souls by living in a healthier, more balanced way.
Through this journey, I have learned that is right to choose always to love —not just for those who are easy to love, but for all. Yes, I am a fighter, yet I choose not to engage in unnecessary battles. I have been wounded since childhood, yet I never turn away from others who are hurting. Thank you for the support from people I never expected—Maureen Ava David, Anna Mae Limson, Ivan Bolor, Franz Albero, Aries Conrad Cabanilla, Joshua Jed Fernandez, Maan Arbole, Grace Demol, Augie Estacio, Edward Mantos, Rosie Infante, Judith Jumilla, Marife Reazo, and Carl Singson. To all of you, I am forever grateful.
Adapting to this new reality is not easy. At times, we smile as if we have accepted our fate, while at other times, we break down, asking God, "Why me?" In these moments of doubt and hardship, let us cling to His promise that He will never abandon us. The pain we endure is temporary, and in time, everything will be alright. To our families and friends, we seek your understanding and patience as we navigate this transition. We are sorry for any burden we may have caused, but it is your love that helps us adjust, little by little.
To end, I have come to believe that love is the greatest healer. A gentle touch soothes like an analgesic, words of encouragement act as powerful medicine, and prayers provide the ultimate cure for our worries. No medical breakthrough can surpass the power of love, care, and faith. This belief gives me hope and light in this difficult journey.
Thank you, God, for Your endless love!