LAST Sunday, I was about to sleep when I learned that my friend was brought to the intensive care unit (ICU). I didn’t know but I was crying and shaking that I would want to fly to reach the hospital as soon as possible. I immediately grabbed my wallet and ride a taxi, but even on a Sunday, the traffic was so bad – Oh, why is the situation so bad?
Upon arriving at the hospital, I saw my friend lying on the bed with oxygen and too many tubes attached to her. It broke my heart to see her that way but I thanked God when I saw her conscious. We were so close to each other, but there were no moments that I have intentionally touched her to show my love and care because I am more comfortable in expressing what I feel through writing.
Oh, I didn’t know but when I got close to her bed, I hugged her without hesitations and I was crying hard. There were other people inside the ICU, but it did not matter because it was how I really felt during that time. And then I told her “pagaling ka na”. I was expecting her to feel sad and pre-occupied with the present discomforts of her illness, but God it made me tremble when she said, “I am so sorry. I am sick, I cannot be with you in our practicum next week because I need to rest for two months”. I said, “Enough, please take a rest”. But she continued and whispered, “I will not be there to remind you to take your medications, you have to see your doctor before you leave, please take care of yourself”.
I left the ICU, ambivalent. For many years, I have had so many good friends but I have realized that she is someone different, unselfish and even powerless. She would always wish to defend me all the time – “siya pa ang may sakit, pero ako pa din ang kanyang iniisip”. I have discovered that her selfless friendship gives value to my survival.
And so I was wrong to say that she is always noisy because she knows how to be silent in a moment when I choose to be alone. I was wrong to say that she is busy because she stays with me in my hour of downfalls. I was wrong to say that she is easily angered because she can tolerate my moods. Oh God, I was wrong to ask her to leave me many times every time I am so busy – when she had been with me at my best and at my worst, and she chose to stay!
And now I asked myself, “Why did you do all this for me?' “'I don't deserve it. Please forgive me for giving you less time, for refusing to have lunch or dinner with you, for scolding you when you arrive two minutes late and for refusing to believe that I am worthy!
Ahh… We must celebrate all the people who truly love us because they love us for no other reason than because of what we are. Life is a battlefield; there are friends who are true and untrue. So, beware of friends who are our real enemies and remain loyal for those who fight for us. And I guess I have to tell this to the whole world - I love you Cynthia Jane Gil Villanueva – get well soon!
